That is the word I would use to describe myself this week and technically last week. I can't help it. I feel like the universe is putting me in positions in which I want to give the middle finger to everyone a few people. Wish I could figure out why. It would be nice to be in a better place. One filled with less animosity and more tranquillity. However, that is not real life and right now these are the feelings I am left with. So until I get my happy ass in the right frame of mind I will let y'all in on a humorous story.

A couple of weeks ago. The Friday after I put Bijoux to sleep to be exact. Debbie Downer over here, I know. I woke up in bed to Dax, Theodore and a big wet spot in the middle of Alex and I. Back story - Alex sometimes gets really hot in his sleep and in general and sweats. I mean drenched, have to change the sheets sweat. Anyway, here is how the morning unfolded:

"Man, babe you really sweat last night."
Alex proceeds to get out of bed.
"Babe, I think the dogs peed the bed."
"Are you sure? Do your boxers smell like dog pee."
I proceed to roll away from the wet spot on bed.
"Smell this, does it smell like dog pee?"
"Dax, Theodore, off the bed."
Slowly make my way out of bed. We remove the sheets.
"Babe, are you sure you didn't pee."
"No, I guess I could have peed the bed."
"I never thought about it but I could have peed the bed."

Who knows what actually happened or how long we had been in it. Just grateful it wasn't near my face. Personally, when I envision the whole thing going down I see either Dax or Theodore standing over me and Alex and literally peeing on us. Gross. Yes. Hilarious. Hell Yes.

More importantly, now I know Golden Showers aren't my thing.

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